8777 911 and the world

I will tell you a story about the Iraq war. The war happened after 9/11. America decided to send troops to Iraq.

They were mostly poor. They oppressed Iraqi. The poor killed the poor during the war that the rich had started.

The FBI warned of an act of terrorists before 9/11. But the warning was not considered seriously. If America took measures of safety, we could avoid two tragedies.

Now, London was attacked by terrorist too. How is Japan? Will the day like 9/11 come in this country? What should we do in that case? Will the government tell us the truth? We should learn a lot from a series of happenings. We should think what is good for each side. You should lead this country better.

 

 

コメント / トラックバック 11 件

  1. myasudakg より:

    Thank you for your posting. よくできました。ではね。雅x

  2. myasudakg より:

    Please do not re-edit this thread. Leave this thread untouched. But, instead post a new one as a secnd or re-write of this thread, giving a title like:
    8777 911 and the world-2
    or
    8777 911 and the world-(2)

  3. myasudakg より:

    Here we go with suggestions for further revision, though I mentioned in class when you receited my correction on the spot today.
    =========
    > I will tell you a story about the Iraq war.
    Let me talk about the Iraq War.
    > The war happened after 9/11.
    after 911 terrorist attacks on America
    Mention when, e.g. 2xxx
    > America decided to send troops to Iraq.
    The US decided to send its troops to Iraq.
    Mention when, e.g. 2xxx
    > They were mostly poor.
    Who are they?
    > They oppressed Iraqi.
    Who are ‘they’?

  4. myasudakg より:

    > The poor killed the poor during the war that the rich had started.
    OK
    > The FBI warned of an act of terrorists before 9/11.
    The US FBI
    acts
    before 911 terror broke out.
    > But the warning was not considered seriously.
    considered vs. taken

  5. myasudakg より:

    > If America took measures of safety, we could avoid two tragedies.
    ちょっとわかりにく内容ですね。
    時制、仮定法を並行移動させます。授業で言及したように。
    had taken
    more measure of domestic security
    they might have avoide such trageedies

  6. myasudakg より:

    > Now, London was attacked by terrorist too.
    Right after 911 attacks on America, London
    terriosts
    > How is Japan?
    How safe

  7. myasudakg より:

    > Will the day like 9/11 come in this country?
    the nightmare like 911
    > What should we do in that case?
    such a crisis
    > Will the government tell us the truth?
    OK

  8. myasudakg より:

    > We should learn a lot from a series of happenings.
    terrors around the world
    > We should think what is good for each side.
    should think what the truths lie behind these incidents and countries involved

  9. myasudakg より:

    > You should lead this country better.
    Rather than depending on mass media or the government alone, we should be more educated to make right judgments on the unstable world affairs.
    I well understand that we should be responsible, but what do you mean by ‘You should’?

  10. kglawf82» ブログアーカイブ » Grading 911 blogs - 10.15.08 より:

    […] 2) http://kgblogcast.com/kglaw2011f2/2008/10/14/8724-fahrenheit-911/#comments 3) http://kgblogcast.com/kglaw2011f1/2008/10/14/8777-911-and-the-world/#comments 4) http://kgblogcast.com/kglaw2011f1/2008/10/14/8782-911/#comments 5) […]

  11. kglawf81» ブログアーカイブ » Grading 911 blogs - 10.15.08 より:

    […] 2) http://kgblogcast.com/kglaw2011f2/2008/10/14/8724-fahrenheit-911/#comments 3) http://kgblogcast.com/kglaw2011f1/2008/10/14/8777-911-and-the-world/#comments 4) http://kgblogcast.com/kglaw2011f1/2008/10/14/8782-911/#comments 5) […]

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